THE SECRETS OF AN INSTA #millennialmom

My Instagram began to blossom as I started documenting my postpartum fitness journey ((and an offensive amount of pictures of my new little man)) via the gram. As I explored Instagram and all it had to offer, I discovered a whole new culture of #millennialmoms who were also sharing tons of photos of their little monsters as well as the ease at which they were #winning ((or maybe hard core struggling)) at this mom thing. As a first time mom, it was hard to navigate the reality vs. the staged in the mom culture created by Instagram. It is easy to compare yourself to the perfectly posed images of other women's #mombods and throw up in your mouth a little when you see someone else's perfectly clean house ((when they claim they have twin one month olds)). So in honor of being completely transparent with you guys, I want to bring you into the reality of my world as a #toddlermom and share with you what REALLY goes on behind the photos.

1. For every cute photo posted there are 47 deleted because my child made the derp face.

I consistently have to bribe my child to get him to stand somewhere for me to take his picture and most of the time only one of the photos is even a clear one because he NEVER STOPS MOVING.

2. I don't post the tantrums because I am either A. dealing with it or B. trying not to draw attention too it in the hopes that my child stops on his own.

I get it, you feel like your child is the worst behaved little human on the planet. It can be guilt inducing to scroll through your Instagram feed and see all these little people on their best behavior. Let me tell you a little secret, our kids ALL have tantrums...its like a part of their growth process. It doesn't mean you are failing at life, it just means your child has normal human emotions and is dealing with them like a toddler usually does when he(or she) can't quite communicate with you fully yet.

3. Caffeine is very much a part of my routine, it rides the line of addiction.

If a new mom tells you she doesn't need coffee to get through her day she is either lying to your face or is addicted to cocaine. Obviously I'm kidding (kind of) but seriously, I'm pretty sure most of us are sleep deprived, hormonal train wrecks in most of our waking hours. I've basically come to peace with the fact that having a child means you and anxiety are going to be buds for the rest of your days and iced lattes are an investment in your sanity.

4. Yes, I let my child watch too much TV.

Whether it be in the morning while I try to get ready, the afternoon while I work, or in the evening while I make dinner, chances are my child watches more TV than most professionals would "recommend." Yes, it gives me a gut wrenching guild sometimes, but I also need to be able to get things done. When it looks like all a mom does is read stories to her little person, don't be fooled, we document those moments because they remind us we can't be failing too hard at this parenting thing if we at least turn the screens off for a little while.

5. My house is never clean for more than 5 minutes.

As soon as I clean up one mess, a new one is made. The key to a clean instagram pic is to either find a white wall for a background or push all the laundry you have piled up out of the way. (how come the laundry is never freaking finished?!)

6. I only brush my hair once a week. ((dry shampoo is a non-negotiable))

Ladies, I'm talking to all of you (not just my momma babes), we all have like one great hair day a week, right? Take as many pics of that ish as you can. Change into multiple outfits if you have too, but for shits sake DO NOT WASTE THE GOOD HAIR DAY. Seriously though, #momminainteasy and brushing your hair can be a lot of effort wasted with a toddler (something sticky will be lodged in there later, I promise). The messy bun (aka the top knot) is truly the way to go. Also, I've worn the same sweatshirt two days in a row, and I'm fairly certain my Instagram followers have noticed I was too lazy to change today.

7. My workout gets interrupted more than once.

As a fitness coach, my job is to take care of my own health and help others learn to take care of theirs. Sometimes this means posting cute workout videos with my little man, since he is the main reason I want to stay fit (toddlers are fast AF). Just because the picture or video was the freaking cutest doesn't mean I got that 30 min workout done in 30 min. Usually you can bank on an extra 15 minutes added to your workout time because you are doubling as a jungle gym if your little person is awake. Just roll with it, they gain so much from seeing you do it no matter how hard you may be struggling.

8. Breastfeeding is a lot less glamorous than we make it look on the gram.

I could write a book about all the misconceptions I had about breastfeeding due to what I saw and read on social media. Let me put it this way, for the first 3 months of Beckett's life I was topless and desperately hoping he would drink enough/ I would produce enough to feed his tiny little body. Currently, I am desperately trying to figure out how to turn breastfeeding off and wondering why I started doing it in the first place. That sweet breastfeeding pic you see on the gram? Ask that mom about all the leaking, the bra pads, the sleepless nights, the engorgement, and the insatiable hunger. We will seriously do ANYTHING for our kids you guys.

9. My mom bod jiggles, don't let me fool you.

As a health coach I stay healthy, that does not mean I have rock hard abs and a body with skin that never moves. When I workout, my skin jiggles, and I most certainly have unflattering angles. It doesn't matter if my stretch marks are few and barely visible, my body went through a freaking insane transformation, and it looks and functions a little differently now. No big deal, its just the reminder that I made a human and am an insane bad ass.

10. Literally EVERY mom is obsessed with her kiddo(s).

I have to hold myself back from posting at least 11 photos of my child a day ((even if he did stick his hand in his poop twice today)). IDK, something about them is just freaking perfect and also really gross all at the same time. So, if you see a mom posting all the time about her little human, don't judge her for being a crazy ass, trust me, she just can't help it. Kids do that to us, and we know we are obnoxious about it, but those mini people are our lives, and we are just trying to keep up.